Why This Isn’t My 40th Anniversary
I miss this girl. Forty years ago she was happy and excited to be married in a couple of days. Optimistic, everything she had ever wanted seemingly falling into place.
Never particularly materialistic, not a seeker of fame or fortune, just an ordinary life. But that was not to be. What seemed to be virtually perfect slowly became not so. It’s insidious you see, the way love and happiness are slowly chipped away. I’m not exactly certain when it occurred, over an extended period of time, years. But the girl in the picture is long gone. She no longer exhists.
How does a marriage last so many years, then just 3 months before a 40th anniversary, be permanently terminated with the signature of a judge? I honestly don’t know. If I did I would be a millionaire. I could sell my magic potion in a bottle. It would bestow upon all who drank of it great wisdom. Wisdom to foresee various outcomes, therefore avoiding them by doing, or not doing what would ultimately lead to the dissolution of a union that never should have been broken.
But alas, that ability escaped me. In hindsight, I see so many mistakes, mistakes made in my opinion mainly by my husband, but certainly, I also see many poor choices and decisions I made. I want a do-over. Although even that may not have saved us. Unless my husband was able to see and avoid all of his mistakes…
